Dear Men and Dear Women...

Dear Men,
The ones who know how to be men. The ones who know how to treat people with respect. To the ones who are honest, kind, forgiving, faithful, loyal, who still open doors, offer their jackets, pump the gas, and give a nice compliment.I know you may think that what you're doing is going unnoticed, but it is not. I see you, and I appreciate you. If the one you're with or trying to court doesn't appreciate it, then they aren't the one who deserves you. Here's the thing, to all my men out there who encounter the ungrateful, rude, ignorant, vindictive woman just know that she is not the representation of all women.

Dear Women,
The ones who know how to be a lady even when you want to act up and curse someone out. The ones who don't need to be naked to get a mans attention The one who isn't rude or messy instead she is smart,confident, honest, faithful, loyal and not judgmental. To the woman who helps her fellow women succeed, instead of focusing on tearing her down. I see you, and I am very proud of you for acting with grace and dignity; in a world where reality TV is telling us to fight and hate one another. To the queens who encounter bad men, abusive ones of all types, physical, mental and emotional, just know that those men aren't a representation of all men.

Ladies and gents, we are all different and the good ones still exist. The good ones get left behind most of the time. The pure at heart ones always get walked on. The decent human begins experience some of the most ridiculous amounts of pain, and I have no idea why. The good ones, we might seem like our fairy-tale ending is never going to happen. We hold on to things that need to be let go. We might be a little defeated but there is always a way if God created will. Don't give up because you've experienced bad eggs. Don't hold the next one accountable for what the previous has done. Keep your eyes open and your hearts protected.

What I learned is, don't settle. Being in contentment is different from being in love. This was something I needed clarity on and God has shown me the definition from many experiences. Now that I know where I'm at in life, I feel so much better.  With that said Ladies and Gents my Queens and Kings you are truly appreciated and don't lose hope.

<3 Ebony

#repost

A photo posted by Ebony Williams (@ebonyonair) on Nov 23, 2016 at 4:10pm PST

MY RESPONSE TO : Why Only Married Men Want to Date Me

I came across this article on Huffington Post written by Brenda Mejia titled: Why Only Married Men Want to Date Me. The original version before she edited it shared how she dated more than one married man now this new revised article shares how she's trying to band women together. Notice when you scroll down to read the comments how the women are angry and mention parts of the article that are no longer available, they aren't crazy readers, they are expressing feelings based off of what was originally written before it was redone. I for one, wrote this response to the ORIGINAL article. 

Took me a while to read this because it's horribly written, and all I could think about was where's the editor? 

On another note, anyone willing to date a married person, man or woman; is someone that needs help. You aren't the only one in the world that's been cheated on, welcome to the club that might hold every person in the universe. To also say it's hard to date because you're a bigger woman, is a diss to all the other fuller women who date perfectly fine. It's not about your size, if someone isn't attracted to you then they aren't the one for you. Here's what bothers me, to be a person who seems to be happy to share that she dates married men is disturbing.

Like you Brenda, to speak from personal experience, I've been approached by plenty of men on social media and in person who are single and married. The beautiful thing about social media is that it connects us to many people across the globe. It's never crossed my mind to go out with someone on twitter just because they've asked, this lets me know that being asked out doesn't happen often for you. Once you found out that this man was married, you continued to date him and try your hand at other women's men, this time knowing their marital status. Then to mention that you don't feel bad about it because you aren't the only one that acted on it? The lack of compassion and sympathy that you mildly express for other people is truly sad. I wonder, has it ever crossed your mind that married men don't want to "date" you instead they want to sleep with you? Also, none of those men left their wives for you, so I imagine that stung a little right? 

This world is tough, and because of social media and the access that it does give us is a blessing and a curse. How you handle being accessed is a different story. You can never be filled by being with a married person because they are not vowed to you, that marriage was not blessed for you, that unity didn't have you in it at the alter and should've never gotten to the point where you were allowed in it. The first one I understand you knew nothing about it, okay that's fine; but for the ones after that to know it and still go for it is not fine. You aren't a peacemaker, you aren't some type of angel that fell from the heavens to help women realize their men aren't perfect, instead you're someone who wants love and needs it so she seeks it from anyone. But Brenda, in order to get that love, have that interest and hopefully find someone to marry you...... first starts with YOU.

Building yourself up to be the best person you can be for yourself will attract the right person. When you're broken and so wounded it brings the pigs and assholes towards you at a rapid pace. I have no idea why it's like scum bags can smell defeat and insecurities a mile away and they prey on people who are satisfied with anything; much like what you're accomplishing by dealing with married men. Fix your heart then maybe someone who's deserving will cherish it properly when the time comes.

I truly hope you find your self-worth, build your self-confidence and believe in yourself soon. Dating married people only causes harm to those involved in more ways than one if you're religious read up on that in the Bible; I'll help you out with some chapters read up in 1 Corinthians and Hebrew chapter 13, and if you're not religious just think of morals and self-respect. I also found it comical that you had the audacity to give advice. Ladies, please don't read this article written by a woman who cannot keep a man or find her own. She's like that single friend who will ruin your relationship so you can be just as miserable as her. 

Woman's Body

People lost their cool when Kim Kardashian posted another nude picture to her social media. (click here to check out the pic) Celebrities chimed in; fans praised Kim K, and others were just flat out rude. I want to know, why is it a surprise that she posted another nude picture? We have seen her naked plenty of times, and heck her launch to fame started off of a sex tape. I don't see an issue with it because well I LOVE the woman's body. It is beautiful, it is strong, and it has plenty of stories to tell from lying about orgasms to scars from an ex to its remarkable recovery rate from creating another human inside of it.

You have to invest your money in other areas besides beauty. Most people see the exterior of the Kardashians, their ridiculously long-running reality show that has NO SUBSTANCE and assume that things are handed to them. What they do not see, is the hard work, dedication, sleepless nights, long hours, days missed with friends and family to be on the road to stay relevant and rich. There is always more than what meets the eye; which is why I stopped judging celebrities and how they live.

There are ways for women to be heard, make a career, find love, have money and live happily ever after without showing their entire bodies. Yes, this is true. We also need to take into consideration, that some people don't have that luxury of having other outlets. So for those women, they do turn to being naked and using their assets to make their way. I don't mind either hustle, as a woman I can understand, but I can not relate to that path. I won't point a finger or judge because I don't know what it's like to walk in those shoes. All I know is that you have to do what you have to do.

Women are so hard on each other the most; it's a sad thing to see and read. We preach equality, rights and a bunch of other things. When someone is happy and embracing their sexuality i.e. Rihanna,  Kim Kardashian, Amber Rose, Pamela Anderson, Tyra Banks, Chrissy Teigen, those women get dragged to hell, WHY? Sexuality is a great thing, it's a beautiful thing, and the woman's body is incredible. It's okay to talk about sex, use sex, say you enjoy sex, express yourself, show your body, hide your body, keep quiet, or be loud.. TO EACH THEIR OWN. If you don't like what these women post, then stop looking.

The older I get, the more I understand Britney Spears' 2007 meltdown. Live your life and focus on yourself instead of hating on the next woman who made it, is making a way, or determined to be somebody

-Ebony