Showing posts with label honest. Show all posts
Showing posts with label honest. Show all posts

Tuesday, November 29, 2016

Don't Call Me Crazy

Don't call me CRAZY.

Man have I talked about this so many times especially in the wake of Kanye West and all these senseless shootings. I believe that crazy makes someone seem childish. It makes it seem like their pain and struggles, and how they act out or have erratic behavior is egotistic and crazy. We call them all these names, we have opinions, we discredit their creativity and possible success. We take away every accomplishment and replaced it with crazy. We take away the fact that they're human and instead call them crazy. That translates to you don't matter.

From personal experience, battling my demons and doing it alone. I was told that I always had someone there, friends, family etc. So when I went to those who "loved me" I was shunned and called crazy. Even when I post great blogs about previous sadness people comment how they are "always there for me" or "you're never alone" or "I'm here!" My response is and always will be, playing saint on social media means nothing

At my peak of being crazy, I was alone because the only one I had died when we were 12 years-old. I had no one, and on plenty of occasions tried to commit suicide. When I told my sister she said that I'm crazy and that I'm stupid along with some other choice words. She had the nerve to get an attitude with me and not hear out my emotions or state of mind.  Another situation of many where I turned to "loved ones" who didn't love me. So from then on, that time in Las Vegas, I vowed to never speak intimate things with her again. I don't regret it, I never will because now I know who is there for me and I can count on them. Do you know how lonely it is to be called crazy? To not have someone take your pain seriously? Then they want to rush to your side when you try to off yourself or cry at the casket when you finally succeed with suicide.

Just because the cover of a book is in color, shinny, has great graphics and amazing font doesn't mean that the pages are glued together. The inside might fall apart once someone cares to open the book and explore it's mind.- Ebony Williams  <3

When I first started this blog, I had no idea how many lives I would touch. I had no idea that there are plenty of people out there who are just like me. Who think like me, who suffer like me, who wonder like me, who question like me and who have no idea what life is about...just like me. This blog is a safe place for those who struggle with LIFE and whatever hell it tries to throw at you. This is the judgment free zone because it's LIFE and we are not crazy. 

Even the ones who have a great  family life, are the life of the party, seem to have it all together according to social media doesn't mean that it's true. Even those who "have it all" might have nothing. Not everyone can be happy. Not everyone has lived a great life and not everyone knows about love. There are plenty of people who experience loneliness to the highest degree. There are people who have no family, or friends, no job, no house, no pet just a sidewalk to call home. There are people who scream for help without saying a word. When we turn down those people, we fail.

If you don't want to take time out of your schedule to listen to those around you when they're screaming silently for help and love. The least you can do is pray for them and help them find help. If listening isn't your strong suit then encourage them to seek counseling because you're unable to help in this situation.  Let them know that you love them and are supporting them. Also hang out with them, even if it's for five minutes or shoot a text message or make a quick phone call. The thing about those who we call crazy they just need someone to listen and understand them. They're battling demons no one knows about.

Stop calling someone crazy and instead ask "are you okay?" 



Monday, April 11, 2016

Transparency

Everyone has a story; not everyone chooses to tell their story. For me, I want to tell my stories because I have nothing to hide, I don't mind, and I understand the platform I'm on so it can be beneficial to others. One thing that comes along with this type of transparency is that I open myself up to criticisms and judgment from people who know absolutely nothing about me.

After talking with my father and other great people in my life, they had some amazing words of wisdom when it comes to people hating on you. Now, I've experienced haters before; that is nothing new to me whether it comes because I'm further in my career, or I finished school, or I'm in killer shape and so on; however, I haven't experienced one who has no reason not to like me. . All of which has been exposed to the fact of jealousy, envy, intimidation and insecurity that this other person possess. At first, I didn't believe these things to be true because we are two different people, two different identities and frankly two different unique styles. That was until I spoke with people who know this person, and the things they shared was very insightful.

For me, this is a genuine case of "it's not me it's you."Once I got that through my head, thanks to those around me,  I'm no longer hurt, irritated or upset that this person who knows nothing but chooses to judge; is simply lost and hurting herself. So I cannot blame them for taking everything (even if it's nice) the wrong way, I cannot blame them for sucking their teeth when people comment me, I can't blame them for the eye rolls when people say hi to me, I can't blame them for being an ass because honestly they are so ugly on the inside that's all that shows on the outside.

Being insecure is a serious issue. It ruins relationships, work related, personal, etc. the list goes on. The only thing you can do is kill them with kindness like you've been doing because any other emotion requires too much energy that they don't deserve. Now be warned, that this will make them hate you more, and for that greet with open arms. Here are a few great quotes from my friends and father who I talked to about my experience with someone like this:



"The Lord is testing your strength! Don't let the enemy get the best of you, honey!" - Jo Jo

"Unfortunately, this is a girl who is reverting to childish antics and lashing out at you out of jealousy" - Daddy

"Insecurity leads to pride, which can lead to being opinionated and having to be right. Often accompanied by control issues and low self-esteem which lead one to lash out at positive people" - ND

"Continue to be nice and let God use you" - NS

"You are one of the most amazing persons I have ever met with the best personality and biggest heart, for other who don't have that quality it's hard to like someone who does" -JJ