Like Samson

so happy in the place that I lusted after..
where lust was after..
my own well being
didn't want to be like Samson,
is what I told my father God when I asked him to deliver me.

giving in, I feel as if I failed
coming across something that my body has once prevailed
the possibility of this cancer infecting my life again
is what keeps me up at night
the reason why the rivers run from my eyes...
as I stare out the window
my task was so simple
all I wanted to do was write....

I didn't want to be like Samson
is what I told my father God when I asked him to deliver me.
sidetracked by the tones of skin
the ones that bind me to open my pathways
one entry should have been blocked
but was allowed in
sinking their teeth into gentle skin
ripped wardrobe to emit sin
ecstasy without the pills
intimacy is what drove me to the hills

I didn't want to be like Samson
is what I told my father God when I asked him to deliver me.
freedom from the thoughts
break these chains of the human heart
pleading for an outlet

I breathed deep, once he told me
broken hearted from what we discussed
from past and present we talked about what once was
and yet... the lie that was revealed
could kill the very reason why I'm alive.

I didn't want to be like Samson....is what I told my father God
repentance I'm at your mercy
I've cried out to you for help, but still I was left alone
to give in to my own ways in which all is left to say is..
I didn't want to be like Samson

<3 Ebony