"Write it out, I gave you the gift of writing for you to express and be free. Honor me with your talent even if you don't want to share light on this one thing. It will and can help someone else" - God...... . <3
As I was talking to one of my girlfriends over the weekend I was listening to her vent about her "mister". She went on to say that every time he needs her she's there, even when she's not needed. One thing that ticks her off is whenever she reads a text that says "babe" he will soon ask for something. I smiled at her and had to reassure her I wasn't being rude. I was smiling because we have a common ground on this topic. Unlike me, my friend and her mister have a real relationship.
When I receive babe messages, I cringe a little because I know sooner or later a favor will be asked; whether it be pics, conversation on his time, money and so on. Another thing that made me smile was that her mister needed money and that was a frequent favor he would ask. In time we get tired of being nice, and helping other people. I get tired of extending my hand to those who take and don't have to courtesy to ask how I'm doing or even say thank you. Let me clarify one thing though, I don't give and expect something in return ACCEPT a thank you, simple enough right? Example, I had a concussion, my family was going through something, I was going through something, leaving voice mails pleading for a call back, oh the list goes on and my "mister" was MIA. But sure enough when he needed something a text would soon come though.
My friend went on to say that her mister loves to say how down he is for "them" and how much he "does". I use quotations because he's very much absent and that's been shown through out the relationship. I smiled at her again and told her, my mister had the nerve to say I was lying when I said he's not there. Brings me to my next point. People don't like to hear what they don't do for you; especially when they know they take whatever they can from you. It's kind of a cover up for how they honestly are in life. They sugar code themselves. My issue is that some people are honestly comfortable with THINKING they are doing great for you, and not ACCEPTING the reality that, no they really aren't doing a damn thing.
Then she asked me "what do I do?" and I replied "what ever you want". I know my friend was looking for advice and some type of guidance with her man situation. But since I'm single, it's not my place to tell another woman who is in a relationship what to do with that relationship let alone how to feel about it. Seeing her face I then said "pray on it, be happy, and listen to what God says". She then asked me "what did you do?" I smiled at her and said " I got tired of being "convenient" so I let go, but the difference is I don't have real ties to mine like you do. Yes we have strong emotions but I've learned from being single that I have to put myself first at times. Sticking my ground on the level of respect I will receive is one thing I wont ever compromise"
I know what's fair and I've been shown that, what I wont do is be complacent with a situation that has possible promise but no action. When I get rid of the distractions, when I'm alone in my prayers, I can hear what he has for me. When I let go, I've heard everything I've been blocking myself from hearing, all because I didn't want to let go. My babe came with a price and I paid it, it came with me being selfish in my WANTS and not submissive to Gods WANTS. Leaving my wants behind, I know what God has ahead of me.
Best decision I've made in years.
