End of 2018

Where has the year gone? 

I don't want to be cliche, but where has the time gone? I feel like it was yesterday, when I decided to follow my heart and move to Los Angeles. It also seems like just yesterday when I was going through the hardest challenges I had ever faced. It was all a test to see if I really wanted it or not. You'll be surprised by how strong you are, when faced with doubts of self and God. 

When the very basics are taken away from you. When you have no choice but to succumb to the oddest of doings just to survive. When you call on those who are "there" for you, only to realize, they never were. It's amazing to me the amount of love I've gained, lost and separated from.  Now that those challenges are over, I can understand why they needed to happen. 

There's always a rise to your fall

Now that those challenges are over, I can appreciate the ones to come. I can also sit still, because God will always see me through. If he sought me through the trails that I faced over the past year, I know, that he will do the same for everything I'm going to face in the future. Because of this, I've found inner peace.  

Knowing that Gods got me, has me relaxed

2019. I wish I could tell you the things that are about to come before the New Year begins. I'm learning to wait, and sit in the blessings. I'm learning to love on them when they come and share them when necessary. I've been sitting on gold for the past six months. I've been sitting on some exciting news for the past week. All of which, will be revealed in time. 

When it comes to thinking about goals for 2019. I don't have any that require losing weight, or eating better nothing like that. Instead it's simple because I've reached so many of my personal hearts' desires. I plan to travel next year, both in and out of country. I plan to continue to love as hard as I can. I plan to pray harder and bigger while working on not panicking. 

For the remainder of the year and 2019, I hope that you're able to accomplish your goals and have all your dreams come true. I hope that you start that business. I hope that you tell that person that you love them. I hope you gather the courage to ask that person out. I hope that you start your diet and work on yourself. Most importantly, I hope that you forgive and LOVE you for you. That you learn to accept you for you. That you know that you're amazing, brilliant, talented and chosen. You are destined for greatness. 

Until next year my friend. 

<3 Ebony 

It's Focus Season

The Things That Escape You

It's funny how things can escape you. Your mind and your habits. For me, it's writing. From time to time I get in these moods or modes where, I'm so focused on a project that i neglect to write in this blog. The best part about this blog is using keywords. I have a lot of you who are subscribed, and wait for the next blog post. When it hasn't been done, I see the search engine keywords. It makes me happy to know that you are still searching for something. It also makes me happy to know that you're searching here for some type of answers.

I noticed that for the entire month of November I've written maybe two blogs including this one. I've been blessed with an opportunity to be contracted to write something amazing that I can't share with you just yet, but I'm excited to share with you soon enough.  I've been so overjoyed and overwhelmed by the opportunity, that everything else was on immediate hold until I was done.

That could be a good thing or a bad thing. 

Good thing because, well, I'm focused. It could also be a bad thing because I'm forgetting about the reality around me. When I'm so focused I pay no attention to the news, social media, those around me and I isolate myself. Then when I'm finished, I come out of this dark room like Gollum looking for the ring. I'm hunched over, crippled with my hands crossing one another, hairless because I took my wig off (just kidding) but you get my drift. 

I have to learn to balance certain things. How to get things done but still be a functioning part of society. Or, is that idea far fetched because as a writer we're never really part of society. We're the outcasts, the loners who create these weird worlds from strange dreams and ideas that others laugh at, but also rush to the theaters to see, or pick up a book to read. We're criticized for thinking differently, awkwardly, strangely but then praised for the ability to create different worlds...it's so confusing. 

Anyways

The point of this blog is to share, that I"ll be back on it soon enough with new stories, more encouragement and exciting news about my career. Stay tuned. 

<3 Ebony 

Be Mindful of The Help & Advice You Respond Too

Who would've thought, that taking certain advice and help from people could actually do you more damage than good? I've experienced many situations where I needed help and advice. I would reach out to certain people for certain things and keep it moving. Recently, I experienced how powerful it can be to heed advice from someone who isn't aligned with where you're going.

Every one of us has a different vision for what we consider successful. Some just work various jobs and pyramid schemes to get rich, others have no sense of structure and just go wherever the check is written, some are strategic, others just go with the flow and don't care. When it comes to taking advice and help from others, it's very important to be careful who the source is.

Just because they mean well, doesn't mean it's Gods plan.

Ever heard a friends' success story, they tell you exactly what they did, you try it and don't get the same outcome? It could be true for diets, exercise, types of meditation and so forth. That's because every one of us is wired differently. What works for someone else might not work for you because you're path is set to a different tune. They're supposed to go left and you're supposed to go right. 

I've learned this lesson the hard way. I was accepting help and advice from someone who meant well. After they would speak, I would get this feeling of condemnation. I would feel very convicted about the thought of going down their trails. It was like God was telling me NO, I have it covered, STOP and WAIT. But while you WAIT I will be SILENT. 

How irritating is it to need God and he's silent? 

For someone like me, it's hard to sit in the silence. Especially when everything around me is falling apart. I'm smiling, I'm "happy", I'm making those around me feel beautiful, smart and so much more because I've very complimentative. All while there's this giant storm that I'm going through, one that I cry myself to sleep too. One that triggers some mental setbacks. A storm that I can't see the light in, but I'm trying to believe that this SILENCE is where I'm supposed to be. Maybe to build my faith I guess?

After all, the happiest people tend to be the ones hurting the most.

 I chose to uplift you even if I'm sinking. 

Now I'm just rambling out my thoughts as if this were a public diary. That's the only thing about not being on the radio anymore. That, I would use that platform to connect with you in a more personal way, now you have to go to the old-fashioned art of reading it...you're welcome. To wrap it up, I'm struggling in the silence, because I know this is where my faith needs to be strengthened. So he keeps putting me in the silence...

Before you seek advice and help from others, please pray on it. Pray for God to send you the right person. It might be someone that you know, it might be someone that you don't know. Most importantly, pray about it, cover yourself in prayer. Protect yourself with Gods shield. 

<3 Ebony 

I Woke Up & Everything Changed....

Ever wake up and you couldn't feel or move your legs? 

Then to have a series of events spiral out of control after that? 

Well, that's what's been going on with me for the past few months. 

Struggling with faith is hard. Struggling to let it go and let God is harder especially when it seems like he isn't working. It's a lonely feeling to think he's not there. He removed all of those who were NOT there for me, just to show me who really IS there for me. Take a look, it's a quick vid. 

<3 Eb