"Write it out, I gave you the gift of writing for you to express and be free. Honor me with your talent even if you don't want to share light on this one thing. It will and can help someone else" - God...... . <3
As I was talking to one of my girlfriends over the weekend I was listening to her vent about her "mister". She went on to say that every time he needs her she's there, even when she's not needed. One thing that ticks her off is whenever she reads a text that says "babe" he will soon ask for something. I smiled at her and had to reassure her I wasn't being rude. I was smiling because we have a common ground on this topic. Unlike me, my friend and her mister have a real relationship.
When I receive babe messages, I cringe a little because I know sooner or later a favor will be asked; whether it be pics, conversation on his time, money and so on. Another thing that made me smile was that her mister needed money and that was a frequent favor he would ask. In time we get tired of being nice, and helping other people. I get tired of extending my hand to those who take and don't have to courtesy to ask how I'm doing or even say thank you. Let me clarify one thing though, I don't give and expect something in return ACCEPT a thank you, simple enough right? Example, I had a concussion, my family was going through something, I was going through something, leaving voice mails pleading for a call back, oh the list goes on and my "mister" was MIA. But sure enough when he needed something a text would soon come though.
My friend went on to say that her mister loves to say how down he is for "them" and how much he "does". I use quotations because he's very much absent and that's been shown through out the relationship. I smiled at her again and told her, my mister had the nerve to say I was lying when I said he's not there. Brings me to my next point. People don't like to hear what they don't do for you; especially when they know they take whatever they can from you. It's kind of a cover up for how they honestly are in life. They sugar code themselves. My issue is that some people are honestly comfortable with THINKING they are doing great for you, and not ACCEPTING the reality that, no they really aren't doing a damn thing.
Then she asked me "what do I do?" and I replied "what ever you want". I know my friend was looking for advice and some type of guidance with her man situation. But since I'm single, it's not my place to tell another woman who is in a relationship what to do with that relationship let alone how to feel about it. Seeing her face I then said "pray on it, be happy, and listen to what God says". She then asked me "what did you do?" I smiled at her and said " I got tired of being "convenient" so I let go, but the difference is I don't have real ties to mine like you do. Yes we have strong emotions but I've learned from being single that I have to put myself first at times. Sticking my ground on the level of respect I will receive is one thing I wont ever compromise"
I know what's fair and I've been shown that, what I wont do is be complacent with a situation that has possible promise but no action. When I get rid of the distractions, when I'm alone in my prayers, I can hear what he has for me. When I let go, I've heard everything I've been blocking myself from hearing, all because I didn't want to let go. My babe came with a price and I paid it, it came with me being selfish in my WANTS and not submissive to Gods WANTS. Leaving my wants behind, I know what God has ahead of me.
Best decision I've made in years.
Monday, April 21, 2014
Friday, April 18, 2014
Tuesday, April 15, 2014
No Means No
So when someone says DON'T ask me something pertaining to a beef with someone else, it's best to listen. Especially if you are on LIVE television! August Alsina checks 106 and Park's host Keisha Chante for asking about his beef with Trey Songz
Monday, March 31, 2014
MESSAGE: Company You Keep
People wonder why I stick to myself. In a previous post I wrote about observance and how if I'm out and about just chillin I'm watching others to get characters for my book. In this blog posting I'm going to go a little deeper into the company that I keep.
I was asked why don't I go to certain events, hang out with certain people that I'm cool with and why do I keep mum about certain things in my life. To answer the first question, I'm a firm believer in watching the company that you keep. I support many people and their endeavors, I respect the hustle of people trying to make it and branch out of Alaska. The reason why I don't attend certain things is because I know the crowd it would draw, and that's not something I'm not willing to be apart of. I don't place myself in positions to where my character is questioned because of those around me.
As far as the second question goes, I hang out with two main people here. When I say hang out, I'm taking about real friendship and conversation, without the worry of it being spread about. I don't mix business with personal, I keep my job my job, my friends my friends, and my family my family. On occasion depending on the friend I will bring them around family, when that's done; I consider them family and not friends. I don't like getting to close to people I have to do business with on a personal level. If it's all about business than let's keep it professional, we don't need to paint each others nails, talk about our pasts and have a sleep over. I would like to know the basics of doing business with someone, but I don't need to know your mamas name and where she grew up.
Lastly, why do I keep everything so mum. Have you ever wondered why certain celebrities are so happy and others are miserable and in the tabloids all the time? You have to think of your life in the same way. Letting all that drama out, letting EVERYONE know what's going on with you at ANY given time (thanks Facebook) will only allow the Vulchers who could care less about you to feed off your pain. When you separate the personal, from business and public everything will have it's own place and you'll be happy with the seperation. Somethings are meant to be personal and kept between two people, not three, four or your family. I've always been happiest when no one knows my personal life. I don't think it's anyone's business on who I'm with, what we are doing, or who he is. Why would someone I don't call a friend and is just an associate need to know how long I've been dating someone? Why would my job need to know if him and I are having problems? Why would my family need to know our intimacy?
The company you keep can harm your professional life. I might be cool with Joe Bob, but Joe Bob is into some heavy illegal stuff that everyone knows about. Why would I take a picture with him and post it as if we are best friends? Now what do I look like? I might think Sally is a great girl, but she's known for her promiscuity why would I take a pic with her and post it? Now what do I look like? Many people mean well, but many people aren't doing well. Many people we know are onto great things, that doesn't mean you need to tag along, who knows what they are doing to get there. I can respect your hustle and not get involved because of the crowd you associate with. You might be okay with hanging out with Joe Bob and Sally, but for the path God has me on, I can't be.
The people you plan to work with can and will look into your social life on these networking sites. I'm mindful of what pictures I post and what I'm doing in them. I'm crafting my life in a way that's acceptable by God now, because of that I have to let many things and people go. At times it's lonely but he assures me it's all worth it so I can maintain my focus.
So I mind the company I keep because if I keep those around me who have goals and are pushing towards them, I'm bound to keep on that path. If I hang with those who aren't doing much, eventually I'll become the same thing. I want to be pushed towards God not driven away. So PERSONALLY, I'm not willing to be less than what God has in store for me, are you?
I was asked why don't I go to certain events, hang out with certain people that I'm cool with and why do I keep mum about certain things in my life. To answer the first question, I'm a firm believer in watching the company that you keep. I support many people and their endeavors, I respect the hustle of people trying to make it and branch out of Alaska. The reason why I don't attend certain things is because I know the crowd it would draw, and that's not something I'm not willing to be apart of. I don't place myself in positions to where my character is questioned because of those around me.
As far as the second question goes, I hang out with two main people here. When I say hang out, I'm taking about real friendship and conversation, without the worry of it being spread about. I don't mix business with personal, I keep my job my job, my friends my friends, and my family my family. On occasion depending on the friend I will bring them around family, when that's done; I consider them family and not friends. I don't like getting to close to people I have to do business with on a personal level. If it's all about business than let's keep it professional, we don't need to paint each others nails, talk about our pasts and have a sleep over. I would like to know the basics of doing business with someone, but I don't need to know your mamas name and where she grew up.
Lastly, why do I keep everything so mum. Have you ever wondered why certain celebrities are so happy and others are miserable and in the tabloids all the time? You have to think of your life in the same way. Letting all that drama out, letting EVERYONE know what's going on with you at ANY given time (thanks Facebook) will only allow the Vulchers who could care less about you to feed off your pain. When you separate the personal, from business and public everything will have it's own place and you'll be happy with the seperation. Somethings are meant to be personal and kept between two people, not three, four or your family. I've always been happiest when no one knows my personal life. I don't think it's anyone's business on who I'm with, what we are doing, or who he is. Why would someone I don't call a friend and is just an associate need to know how long I've been dating someone? Why would my job need to know if him and I are having problems? Why would my family need to know our intimacy?
The company you keep can harm your professional life. I might be cool with Joe Bob, but Joe Bob is into some heavy illegal stuff that everyone knows about. Why would I take a picture with him and post it as if we are best friends? Now what do I look like? I might think Sally is a great girl, but she's known for her promiscuity why would I take a pic with her and post it? Now what do I look like? Many people mean well, but many people aren't doing well. Many people we know are onto great things, that doesn't mean you need to tag along, who knows what they are doing to get there. I can respect your hustle and not get involved because of the crowd you associate with. You might be okay with hanging out with Joe Bob and Sally, but for the path God has me on, I can't be.
The people you plan to work with can and will look into your social life on these networking sites. I'm mindful of what pictures I post and what I'm doing in them. I'm crafting my life in a way that's acceptable by God now, because of that I have to let many things and people go. At times it's lonely but he assures me it's all worth it so I can maintain my focus.
So I mind the company I keep because if I keep those around me who have goals and are pushing towards them, I'm bound to keep on that path. If I hang with those who aren't doing much, eventually I'll become the same thing. I want to be pushed towards God not driven away. So PERSONALLY, I'm not willing to be less than what God has in store for me, are you?
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